I havnt written much lately, just really havnt had much time.  And these days i've been very happy with work and everything else that's going on.  Last night I was bored and I really wanted to write something, so I thought of a story and I wrote this.  Let me know what you guys think.

WHITE LIES

I’m trying to reach you/dying to teach you/

ways to crush the demons that eats you/

you lookin’ at a mirror that’s see through/

Everyone else sees you/those white lies you told/

are like the white lines through your nose/

that you snorted or smoked/It feels right at the moment/

You’re more "white" than the snowmen/

Look at your mom, she cries to sleep/

Look at your self, you can’t even sleep/

You look at your sister and she looks at you back/

you wanna tell her you love her, but something’s holdin’ you back/

How can you tell her, that you’re addicted to crack???/

You don’t got a job, you ain’t got money/

Its funny/

You would tell me in school, how you'd neva be a junkie/

you would come up with ways, to get straight A’s,

and deal with the problems you faced/ you succeeded every day/

U used to come to your house and make a hot plate, for your sister/

told her how much you missed her/

Tuck her to bed, tell her "I love you", and kissed her/

Then go back downstairs to clean up the house/

Mom worked 18 hours a day, you did what you can to help her out/

And before you went to bed, you used to talk to god/

Ask him to watch over your family and keep them from harm/

Now you barely go home/you wander alone/

looking for answers to questions you don’t even know/

When your mom asks you to stay, you get pissed at her!!!/

When you come down from your high,

you cry, caused you bitched at her!!!/

I pray for you every night man, I don’t want you to die/

I’m tryin’ to help man, I don’t wanna say good bye/

I'd give up my life for you man/ I want you alive/

You're my best friend, PLEASEE stop living this white lie!!!!

copyright©  Benny Mathew, 2005

This is something i wrote also.  This is kinda sad.  It's about someone that was a good person in his past, but fucked it all up himself.  It's about someone that had such a bright future ahead of him but now they don't know where they will end up in a couple of years. In this every stanza compares life as glass.    Let me know what you guys think.

Broken Glass                                                                       

A life that was precious

Like a fragile piece of glass.

Been shattered and battered

Now just wanna regain the past.

A life that at once

Was crystal clear.

Now stuck in a dark room

Eyes closed, shaken in fear.

A life that at once

Gleamed in the rays of the sun.

Now only darkness is seen

And is unable to see anyone.

A life that was once

Able to be cleared and purified.

Now covered under layers of eternal dust

Because the soul has died.

A life that was once

a window to the world

Would never again

Get a chance to be loved.

A life that once

Mirrored glory and greatness

Cracked when it turned its soul

Over to satan.

A life that was precious

Like a fragile piece of glass,

Been shattered and battered

Now just PRAYING to regain the past

copyright©  Benny Mathew, 2005

What up everyone? havn't put up anything in a while..Been bizzee..Anyways I wrote this a while ago..this is STRICTLY FOR THE LADIES. =) courtsey of Benny Mathew..haha

As We Become One                                                                                        

Start with a kiss, feel the touch of my lips,

reminisce as I take you into a bliss.

Hold you tight, feel my fingers on your back.

Start pressing your skin and kissin’ your neck

Lay you on the bed, baby let me take you to heaven.

This moment will be treasured forever

Please you to the fullest, but never

Tell a soul, its between you and I

Don’t deny, till I die, keep you close

Never lie, never cheat, I give you an oath

A promise till the end, my best friend

You were godsend,

Love me tonight, I could go on for hours.

Let me make you explode, as I unload

I’m a man not a coward.

Let me feel your legs, and stroke your thighs.

I can hear your heart start to beg, you’re feeling a high.

I made my move now I’m in ecstasy inside

Finding the right spots, I know how to use mine

You’re so fine, I  wanna freeze time

Lick my fingers, like a piece of lime

The juice starts to flow, as I grow

More and more now you know

Only you can do this, with just one kiss.

Only you can make this so precious.

If a picture can say a thousand words,

Then a picture of this is says a billion.

Oh baby this is our world,

The only place I wanna be in.

Keep moanin’ and groanin’

Cause it’s on till the mornin’.

Like lil kids enjoyin

Watchin’ fire works explodin’.

We waited for so long for this moment to come,

Worth every second, cause now we’ve become one.

  copyright©  Benny Mathew, 2005

What up guys? I wrote this one a while ago, i feel that this is ONE OF THE BEST ONES that i've written.  It's me completely honest, and every bit is the truth about my life and my view of death.  When you read this, let the words sink it and have a beat in your head.  I hope you enjoy this.  I'm thinkin of sendin' this one to a company to get published.

My Mansion 

I take the blanket off my face.

I could taste the tears

I’ve been shedding for days.

I keep thinking of life and the days that I’ve wasted.

I think of my problems and the ways that I’ve faced it.

Wasted, finally smoked out on weed but I laced it

With a line of coke, can’t explain the way that it tasted.

That was life and I couldn’t get out of the basement.

I lived a lie, can’t change, even after I got arrested.

I keep runnin’ in circles, cause I can’t find a place to rest in.

Best in my class in the past but I had to be bad so its sad to loose what I had.

I understand now I can’t be the man who had planned to withstand against the man.

Should I run, should I hide, should I continue to reside?

On this planet, I can’t stand it, do I wanna commit suicide?

No, leave me alone, I’ll be gone, I’ll find a home, I’d rather be alone.

Let me be what I wanna be, which is me, I have eyez that can see

I can feel the extasy, I see what you won’t let me see.

You can never get the best of me, You know why???

Cause I can never get the best of me.

Charge me, with a felony, see where the fuck that will put me.

Can’t you bitches see, I don’t even wanna breathe, just let me sleep

So I can finally be at peace, in my mansion, six feet deep.

copyright©  Benny Mathew, 2005